Something is off. You can’t say what.
You’ve explained it to yourself a hundred times. It still doesn’t add up.
I’ve sat across from the homeless man and the millionaire. The drug user and the royal.
Nurses. Project managers. Couples about to lose each other. Families at war.
A mother who, after 20 years, still feels so much shame for divorcing. The father who does not know how to make amends. Parents who never heard or saw their child. People that are so afraid of not finding the right partner that they compromise and are stuck in unhappy and toxic relationships.
A leader who took the role and quietly came apart. A founder who raised the money, built the company, and can’t let go of the control.
I speak to all of them the same way. Empathetic, blunt, no difference for status.
They already knew the problem. They simply didn’t want to accept it and with that comes stagnation.
“In the first session, Alek said something ten years of therapy hadn’t reached.”
The initial programme is 7 sessions, between 60 and 120 minutes each. Once a week.
Then the after-work, the most important part. You place what you learned into your daily life. We decide if we continue once a week, every two weeks or once a month.
The first call decides the work and what you pay. One fee, whether you come alone, as a couple, a family or a business.
Leader, founder or running a business? →The method · Lifemapping
Your whole life on one line. From your mother’s pregnancy to today. We find the moments that shaped you, and the personas you built to survive them. Those personas are still running your life. Mostly your relationships and behaviour.
Then the other half. Accept it. Understand it. Act on it. That last part is 90 percent of the work.
- 01 Accept
- 02 Discover
- 03 Understand
- 04 Decide
- 05 Act — the 90%
Once you understand the core problem, the current problems obliterate.
This is mine.
● Painful ○ Good
Why me
Born to a woman who could not love me. Raised by my grandmother.
Awarded athlete. Bullied for being me: gay. Personally speaking, I am not crazy about being gay. Escaped to the USA at 16.
Self-made millionaire, the golden boy. At 36, my grandmother died, and my resilience with her. My buried childhood trauma resurfaced at once.
Bankrupt. HIV. Drugs. Without a home for 7 years. Sold my body for cash.
Co-dependent, gripped by fear of abandonment. I stayed in a very toxic and tragic marriage for 14 years, where I made myself as small as I possibly could. I fought my way out alone, by making my pain bigger than myself.
I wrote The Loss of Self. I became a coach.
And mainly a man who decided he won’t leave this world the way he entered it, unwanted and rejected by his own mother.
My superpower is seeing what you already know but won’t accept. I will hear and see you.
Read my story →From the addict to the CEO.
Trusted by leaders at H&M, Harrods and one of Fortune’s 10 most admired companies, and over 150 private clients.
“He mirrored me until I understood my micromanaging problem came from a lack of trust, and that it went back to my father. You’d be an idiot not to involve him in your life.”
“Not a coaching session, a brutally honest journey to your true self. Unflinching, yet incredibly empathetic.”
Who this isn’t for
People looking for a soothing hour that changes nothing.
People who want to work on one symptom and leave the rest alone.
Anyone in acute crisis needing clinical care. I’m a coach, not a therapist.
People who need a diagnosis more than they need honesty.
I work with: relationships, divorce and separation, trauma bonds, childhood trauma, grief and loss, addiction, family estrangement, fathers and mothers, fertility stress, leaders under pressure. In English, German, French and Luxembourgish.